As the twins roll up to the fray, they realize that Mecha Russel Brand is actually a shape shifter. “HOLY MOOSE!” Taylor proclaims. As Geoff is trying to figure out how Taylor inserted a fully formed exclamation point into actual conversation, MRB(short for Mecha Russel Brand) transforms into………….something. it is without description. It had two heads. at least three fully formed noses per face. Seventeen Ears. So many ears. Oh God WHY THE EARS! And , if it were inside out or something, where it’s heart would be, A POTATO! (musical crescendo). Taylor Realizes that this is her time to shine, and instructs Geoff to row faster. So much faster in fact, that they manage to create a rift in time. We wont hear from them until i feel like it again. that is, assuming they went forward in time. [The Editorial staff has officially lost the ability to determine which scribbles are plot notes for the editor, and which are actual narration. - ED.] as everyone stares dumbfounded, MRB shape shifts back into his original form (a guy in a moose costume who has nothing to do with the story.) [Wait, what? - ED] as things begin to settle down, Canada, being slow on the uptake, regains his duck call in a heroic battle with the floor, who had enlisted the help of Gravity to thwart our stalwart Nation. But before he can call for more ducks, (the original swarm having gotten bored and flown off looking for a drink), Ms. Moose thwacks the whistle out of Canada’s hand with a loud THWACK. Ms Moose doesn’t have time for this nonsense, as it quickly approaching last call. Copper Pipe, having taken the form of what the narrator guesses is either a cowboy or a gangsta, (as it turns out, both groups saunter and strut in a similar fashion) makes his way to the bar and taps out “.-.. .- … - / -.-. .- .-.. .-..” [Last Call - ED]. Only misunderstanding two letters, Canada realizes that this fight has taken the better part of all night, and politely informs Ms Moose that It is in fact, last call. As both Ms Moose and Canada walk up to the bar to place their orders, The Twins exit the rift in time that apparently went forward. Propelled by blood lust and physics, The Twins crash into the bar, and the resulting explosion would make Michael Bay say “too much. Less explosion”
Ms Moose doesn’t look at the explosion, finally fulfilling her dream of being an action movie star. Canada can’t stop staring, fulfilling his dream of being an action movie sidekick. The Twins, being in a protective bowl of water that was protected by tachyons, were unharmed, but got a great light show in the process.
Truly Frustrated, Ms Moose has had enough of these shenanigans. Calling a a flatbed Cab, she rounds up her compatriots and goes off in search of another bar.
Will our brave protagonists ever find solace? or at least a quiet drink? and what of the Bartender? find out in the next thrilling installment.
Ms Moose doesn’t look at the explosion, finally fulfilling her dream of being an action movie star. Canada can’t stop staring, fulfilling his dream of being an action movie sidekick. The Twins, being in a protective bowl of water that was protected by tachyons, were unharmed, but got a great light show in the process.
Truly Frustrated, Ms Moose has had enough of these shenanigans. Calling a a flatbed Cab, she rounds up her compatriots and goes off in search of another bar.
Will our brave protagonists ever find solace? or at least a quiet drink? and what of the Bartender? find out in the next thrilling installment.
